Is there a better feeling in the world.....

....than getting to call the cable company and tell them you want to discontinue service.

Ok, maybe sex. Or free money. Or a good football game. Heroin's apparently pretty good too. Ok, there are a lot of better feelings.

Point is, it's such a liberating feeling to call the cable company and tell them to take a hike. Oh why did I want to disconnect my service, the "retention specialist" asks? Because you don't have NFL network. And your picture quality sucks. At which point he of course tells me that the NFL is greedy and they're trying to negotiate something and hey, I still get the other football games. At which point I of course respond that that's fantastic, but it's not the NFL network.....and you didn't even address the terrible picture quality. Oh, is there anything you can do to retain my service, you ask? I said sure, free HBO and Showtime. And then he grudgingly admits defeat.

Victory is mine. Soon the cable will be gone, replaced with sunny happy AT&T U-verse and it's more channels, faster internet, better picture quality, and a free DVR that will record four shows at once. Oh, and the NFL network. And just in time for Winter.