Sunday, August 24, 2008

And the winner is.......




.....Joseph Biden, whom in this picture looks like an older Val Kilmer. Can't you see him with the thin mustache claiming that he's your huckleberry or saying, "Wyatt" in that southern drawl that epitomizes pretty much the best role Val Kilmer ever played? I sure can.
But I guess that's burying the lead. The story is that, inexplicably, Barack Obama has chosen Val, errrr, Joe Biden the senior Senator from Delaware and known plagiarist, as his running mate. The pundits are claiming it is meant to bolster his "foreign policy credentials" because of the high ranking Senate committees he's chaired.

Well, why didn't you just say so. Now I understand completely why a guy campaigning as an outsider and promising change would nominate a career politician (sixth longest serving time amongst current Senators) that was just talking shit about him mere months before. But I guess sacrificing the entire campaign platform is so totally worth it when you'll win Delaware. I mean, it's Delaware....they've got crab cakes and....umm, I was gonna say Dunder Mifflin but I think that's New Jersey. So Delaware has crab cakes, and now Obama has Delaware. I think they also have a lot of Philadelphia Eagles fans in Delaware too, so when Obama needs people to throw snowballs filled with batteries and cheer on life-threatening injuries, he's got that covered to.....and crab cakes.

It's a running joke that the Democrats can snatch defeat from the jaws of victory, and I'm like a proud parent watching them do it again. It's so sad it's funny. Which isn't to say that Obama is going to lose this election, I mean considering his opponent....well maybe this is just Obama handicapping himself, you know, to make it a fair fight.

But, just in case you wanted a better reason to dislike Xerox Joe, you know besides my incipid ranting, he is pro-RIAA and anti-privacy. Haven't found anything about him regarding Net Neutrality, though he did vote for the Iraq war. So ya, we've got that going for us. I gotta say, I'm pretty damn disappointed in Barack Obama today.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Alright, "known plagiarist"? Seriously, that might be over-stating it a bit, to say the least. He had accredited that speech a ton of times before, but just didn't that time. It would have been a much smaller issue if it had happened today, anyway.

As far as the change statement, it depends on what your view of change is, I guess. I'm not sure you could call an Obama/Biden administration a continuation of current policy, nor would I consider Biden your average Beltway shill.

But more than anything, our foreign policy is so fucked right now that we can't afford a guy that's even more hawkish and bullish than Bush. So we need someone that helps us win, that has the credibility to defend the ticket against McCain's bullshit, and someone that has a story to tell. If nothing else, it proves once again that Obama, more than anything, is a pragmatist, not an ideologue. And frankly, that's pretty appealing.